Day 4

So the picture generally sums up whats up in my life. I seem to be having a great amount of success in the female department and really all its doing is making me pretty pissed off. I mean the amount of time it takes and then to tell them to fuck off means being an asshole. Anyways I have decided 3 months separated from the pussy should do me some good and give me time and space to breathe a little.

Now that that's off my chest let's get down to some other business. I really feel like right now I am at a point of growth and I am not really sure about how to handle it or in which direction the growth is. Personal, work, family, some or all of the above. I am really comfortable with my current situation which is pissing me off because that means I am not taking risks or putting myself out there. Perhaps the one woman who I actually value right now said something quite intuitive and made me think, "Only when your really happy with yourself and your life can you commit to a relationship and make that a good situation to be in." I think that actually applies to basically every area that I identified above. So the big question become what to do next, yet another problem presented by having a choice. Options are a bitch cause they generally lead to paralysis which is why when face with a do or die situation it forces a decision and a course of action. Basically, there needs to be a commitment to a course of action, and currently that course of action is celibacy which in itself is not a solution to much but hopefully will result in a clear mind, and that at least is a start.